Tuesday

One of my sage friends suggested today that perhaps there was some inherent discipline associated with my blogging. After all I have been managing to do it in a regular way for over a year now, perhaps even two years. I assured him that there was no such discipline at play. It's a compulsion or a reflex, like needing to throw up suddenly when you were feeling fine or kicking out your leg when someone bangs on your knee. It's like nature calling and I have no control over when it will happen, but when the mood strikes me I respond without question. It's the least I can do to hold up my end of the bargain.

This thing we call creativity is allusive to me. I live in fear that it will leave me or that when I am called upon to perform I will have nothing to contribute. Creativity seems to fall out of me when I least expect it. It wakes me up in the night, it jumps out of books and food. I see glimpses of it in toothpaste and rabbits feet. What I have learned is to just keep my eyes open and my mouth shut and gather in ideas or shards of ideas or leaves or eggs or whatever there is to be gathered. And then I wait for an opportunity to use what I have gathered, sometimes I wait a long time and sometimes I don't wait at all. Those are the lucky days. So I guess the discipline lies in being conscious everyday which on the whole is fairly easy to do. The rest of it is out of my control so why worry about it.